Week 0
The Seattle Seahawks are the 2025 Super Bowl Champions!
Kenneth Walker wins Super Bowl MVP
2026 KICKOFF
HERE WE GOOOOO! We start off the 2026 Dubtown Fantasy Football season with a draft day disaster and proxy galore. Birthday parties, final hoorahs, and overtime work held a few league managers out of the draft this year, but it was the Lowe brothers who saved the day. Shout out to all of the league members who made it to the draft and gave the participation that this league deserves.
Thank you to the Tunzi family for hosting the draft again and thank you to Mish for setting up and providing us with a safe space for our draft day non sense.
Jahmyr Gibbs goes 1.1 and Will Reichard goes 13.12 to bookend the 2026 draft. 7 RB’s and 5 WR’s go in the first round. Josh Allen goes 3.2 as the first QB off the board and Jeremiyah Love goes 3.4 as the first rookie taken this year. Brock Bowers and Trey McBride go in rounds 2 and 3 as the first two TE’s taken and the Texans get drafted in round 10 as the first D/ST taken.
Season Preview with Mish
Editor-In-Chief sat down with the Dubtown FF Commissioner for a pre-season interview and to ask about predictions for the upcoming season. We don’t know if he was drunk or high during this interview, but we want to make sure that his story is heard.
🏟️ NFL Season Predictions
1. NFL MVP
Answer: Joe Burrow
2. Offensive Player of the Year
Answer: Jahmyr Gibbs
3. Defensive Player of the Year
Answer: Will Anderson
4. Offensive Rookie of the Year
Answer: De’Zhaun Stribling
5. Defensive Rookie of the Year
Answer: Sonny Styles
6. Comeback Player of the Year
Answer: Kyler Murray
7. Coach of the Year
Answer: Liam Coen
8. Super Bowl Champion
Answer: Packers
9. Super Bowl Matchup
Answer: Packers vs. Jaguars
10. Biggest Surprise NFL Team
Answer: Jaguars
11. Biggest NFL Disappointment
Answer: Patriots
🔥 Hot Takes
1. Give one fantasy football hot take.
Answer: Gibbs will break the record of most points scored in a season.
2. Give one NFL hot take.
Answer: Substation causes more injuries to the 49ers.
3. Name a player everyone loves that you're avoiding this season.
Answer: Puka Nacua
4. Name a player everyone is sleeping on.
Answer: Secret
5. Which first-round fantasy pick will disappoint?
Answer: Jaxon Smith-Njigba
🏁 Bulletin Board Material
Which manager are you calling out right now?
Answer: Kyle and Kirby
Who is the most overrated team entering the season?
Answer: Kyle and Kirby
What prediction do you guarantee will happen this year?
Answer: Wyatt aka Red not making the playoffs.
Leave one final message to the league.
Answer: Mish is back and making a statement this season.
TEAM NAME RANKINGS
Romo Was My Ride (Chris Lowe) - Better call an Uber, bro!
Blitz All Night (Daniel Benjamin) - Anything Remember the Titans really GMDH!
Trailer Park Boys (Kyle Yung) - Bang Bang! Mac Dre was the OG pimp of the Bay Area. Next time you need need a woman, just call 1-800-save-a-hoe.
Swag Dahdi (Tyler Bowman) - #1 all time team name and will never get old.
CookinProxys (Tyler Laron) - “I been Steph Curry with the shot, been cookin’ with the sauce, Chef Curry with the pot, boy”.
Tuten N Bootin’ (Matt Fortney) - New Boot Tuten. Tuten N Boot It. Anyway you phrase it is fine with me.
Zero Gibbs Given (Tony Tunzi) - Zero dark thirty is what time this guy wakes up. Go to bed, bro!
VIEJO ROJO (Wyatt North) - Old Red is in the mix but still has never learned Spanish. Come try some TJ tacos with me if you ever want some culture.
Maye God Have Mercy (Traynor Flores) - This guy has never been to church and would likely burn for his sins if he ever did go.
Autodrafters Anonymous (Jordan Reyes) - AA is always a last resort. Until then, we ball!
Editor-In-Chief (Kenny Burroughs) - Is that the best you could come up with? It’s not even witty.
Kirby Had A Little Lamb (Greg Kirby) - Kids Bop head ass name.
OVERREACTION OF THE WEEK
Gimmie ALL of the Bills players this year! Let me get a couple of Broncos and Jaguars too. The Chargers with a competent OC might be lethal if they can keep Herbert out of Hollywood. I feel like the Chargers are going to be the top scoring offense this year and even if Omarion Hampton hits a sophomore slump, they still have Vidal, McConkey, and QJ to fall back on.
I am avoiding both New York teams, Las Vegas, and Minnesota this year - so basically half of Kirby’s team. Minnesota seems like they have a top receiving corps, but I don’t trust Addison to stay out of trouble, Kyler to show up on time, and I don’t trust Jauan Jennings to not be a hoe. But Shelby Harris is on the Giants now, which might be a step up from the Browns, so who is really the hoe?
Let me get off some hot takes and guaranteed winners:
Bo Nix over 4,000 yds. Jaylen Waddle over 1,150 yards.
Emeka Egbuka is a non factor this year and Baker is going to mother fuck everyone out the door.
Jeremiyah Love is going to be on a pitch count all year or he tries to play hero ball and breaks his leg like Wade Phillips 2016.
New Orleans top 10 offense (which basically means #10).
Patriots cheating scandal. Mark that one as correct before the season starts.
Arch Manning to the Raiders next year.
Death, taxes, Lowe getting kicked out of the group chat.
EDITORS NOTE
Thanks to the league for putting up with my BS and banter. I am looking forward to a good season and all of the shit talk that comes with it. I will do my best to keep the blog fresh and new, but you’ll still get a lot of the same regurgitated jokes from the last few years. It’s a week-to-week league, you know. Sometimes maybe good, sometimes maybe shit.
Peace, KB