Week 13
THANKFUL FOR FOOTBALL!
Happy Turkeys all around the league! Jordan Love matches his career high with 4 TD passes, we got the 3 best catches of the year in one week, the Bears had 2 RBs rush for over 120 yds each, and the Broncos are still #1! Countdown to the playoffs starts now. AJ Brown is hot at the right time, but the Eagles are not. Trey McBride and Brock Bowers stay hot at the right time, but the Cardinals and the Raiders are already eliminated. Dak Prescott is single handedly willing the Cowboys to the playoffs and it looks like it may work. The Cowboys upset the Chiefs on Thanksgiving day and potentially knock Mahomes out of playoff contention.
The Carolina Panthers and the Houston Texans use their defense to win their Week 13 matchups as Matt Stafford throws two picks in the 1st quarter and 1 of them goes for six the other way. Those big pearly white chompers on Stafford are good for Thanksgiving dinner, but weren’t a big enough bite to outlast Bryce Young and Tet McMillan. Davante Adams leads the league in receiving TDs with 14 and the next closest only sits at 9! Still, the Rams are favorites to win the Super Bowl, but the NFC West is WIDE OPEN! Almost as wide open as Jauan Jennings mouth…
JSN and Sam Darnold aren’t needed in Week 13 as the Seahawks blank Max Brosmer and the Vikings with a defensive score and 4 FGs from Jason Meyers. All around good wins were the story of Week 13 including Miami winning their 3rd in a row and Devon Achane going over 1,000 yards on the season. Achane is having a quiet but impactful season and it is only fitting that Kirby is keeping his cards close to his chest and quietly riding his RBs to the one seed. Kirby is either at CYO practice or Traynor has him locked in the storage closest and is ghost managing his team for him. Someone check on him.
Week 13 BUMMERS
Lamar Jackson in his last three games has 0 TDS, 3 INTs, 2 fumbles lost, and has taken 8 sacks - all against some mediocre defenses. I suppose it doesn’t help when Zay Flowers fumbles the football and achieves negative FF points on the week.
BTJ and Travis Etienne don’t show up for the Jaguars in Week 13, but similar to the Seahawks, their team didn’t need the major offensive production from them to get the win. Michael Pittman Jr. on the other hand was much needed to get the Colts a win but he is no where to be found with only 1 catch on the day. Maybe Daniel Jones isn’t as good as we thought or maybe playing on a broken fucking leg is not helpful either.
Justin Herbert - Broken Hand.
Sauce Gardner - Calf injury.
Aaron Jones- Questionable.
Woody Marks - Questionable.
Adam Thielen - Waived.
Justin Jefferson - Misses Sam Darnold.
Aaron Rodgers - Old and grumpy.
Matchup of the Week
By the hairs on his chinny chin chin - Lowe McCaffrey is a top 3 team in the league! No more than 15 points per player but it’s enough to beat up on the Fairy Boy. Monday Night Football produced some drama late in the game but the Patriots D/ST scored a return TD that was the deciding factor. Tua Tagovailoa is going to meet the waiver wire after this week and it’s going to be Brock Purdy from here on out for I Think I Pulled McCaf. That’s a pair of 49ers leading the 3rd place FF team - seems to be adding up correctly. Tough matchup against King Kirby next week, but it’s playoff bound for this team anyway.
Y’all wanna win?! Put the white boy in! Alec Pierce on the bench For Kyren Out Loud?! White man CAN jump! Tough showing from this FF team and it was half white half black Pat Mahomes who salvaged any sort of a score this week. What’s with all the talk about skin color?
AS SEEN ON REDDIT
〰️
AS SEEN ON REDDIT 〰️
The 49ers have already won the bye week
San Francisco, currently the #7 seed in the NFC, is on bye for week 14 and they've already won!
CHI-GB:
CHI wins and SF passes GB, moving to the #6 seed.
GB wins and SF passes CHI, moving to the #6 seed.
CHI-GB tie and SF passes GB in NFC record, moving to the #6 seed.
Regardless of the CHI-GB result, SF will jump ahead one of them.
SEA-ATL & LAR-ARI:
If SEA loses to ATL, SF will advance to the #5 seed.
IF LAR lose to ARI, SF will advance to the #5 seed.
If SEA & LAR lose, SF jumps all the way up to the #2 seed.
All while on bye.
GOOD RIDDANCE
〰️
GOOD RIDDANCE 〰️
Please join me in saying goodbye to the latest team eliminated from the 2025 Dubtown FF season.
Ken You Dig It?
DRAFTED ROSTER:
11th Pick - Brian Thomas Jr. Jax, WR
14th Pick - Derrick Henry Bal, RB
35th Pick - Jalen Hurts Phi, QB
38th Pick - Jaxon Smith-Njigba Sea, WR
59th Pick - DeVonta Smith Phi, WR
62nd Pick - David Montgomery Det, RB
83rd Pick - Chris Godwin Jr. TB, WR
86th Pick - Kaleb Johnson Pit, RB
107th Pick - David Njoku Cle, TE
110th Pick - Jayden Higgins Hou, WR
131st Pick - Texans, D/ST
134th Pick - Tyler Bass Buf, K
155th Pick - Ray Davis Buf, RB
FINAL ROSTER:
Jalen Hurts - QB4
Derrick Henry - RB9
David Montgomery - RB22
Devonta Smith - WR16
Deebo Samuel - WR24
Dallas Goedert - TE7
Travis Etienne Jr. - RB12
Falcons - D/ST9
Jason Meyers - K1
Jordan Addison - WR45
Kayshon Boutte - WR37
Emanuel Wilson - RB44
Chris Godwin Jr. - WR129
Top Rookies of the Week
Highest scoring FF rookie QB, RB, and WR/TE of the week.
Tyler Shough - 17.36 points
Kyle Monangai - 20.0 points
Tetairoa McMillan - 11.8 points
Have You Seen Me?
Players in the FF starting lineups who did not perform this week.
Zay Flowers - -0.4 points
Justin Jefferson - 1.4 points
Khalil Shakir - 1.0 points
GETS MY DICK HARD OF THE WEEK
〰️
GETS MY DICK HARD OF THE WEEK 〰️
Jaxson Dart gets absolutely JACKED UP by Christian Ellis! Gets my dick hard!
FAT GUY TOUCHDOWN
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FAT GUY TOUCHDOWN 〰️
Bucs OL Tristan Wirfs catches the pass from Baker Mayfield for the FAT GUY TOUCHDOWN!
Overreaction of the Week
The NFC is CRAAAAZY! Everyone only has 3 loses, but the Bears play the Packers next week and it’s time for Chicago to change the narrative. You can’t feel safe if you don’t get the BYE in the first round of the NFC. No matter what seed you are, it is going to be a dog fight. Can’t wait. Let’s just hope for no injuries.
13 weeks in and I finally feel like we are at the point to say who is good and who isn’t. I think everyone knows how I feel about most of the NFL teams, but I want to look more into who is who in FF this year. No one wants to hear about who I “knew was going to be good this year”. So. let me break down who surprised me this year up to this point.
CMC was a risk just because of what happened to Squid last year.
Pat Mahomes as the #2 FF QB after 13 weeks STILL surprises me honestly. It is so obvious they have regressed but somehow the numbers are there for Mahomes.
I wasn’t going to touch Javonte Williams or D’Andre Swift with a ten foot pole, but that’s only because they’ve screwed me in past years. I guess Squid and I both have trust issues with our ex-RBs.
Davante Adams having a HOF career is wild. He has similar (if not better) numbers to Mike Evans, but I guess you gotta win a Super Bowl to get HOF talk. Not sure why I’ve underrated him so much… probably the whole Raiders thing.
Around Dubtown:
1,627 points-for out of B1G C0*K BROCK can not go without recognition! Huge points machine from Kirby going into the end of the season. So what does that mean for us underdogs who have all of these points against? Should their be a playoff selection committee? Why is it my fault that I got a bad draft order and bad schedule slot? Welp, at least I am not going to have to caddy… but I will have to train for a 40-yard dash. That’s going to be interesting.
It’s a race to the bottom between Port My Ash and La Llama Roja. Neither of their Week 14 opponents need a win at this point, but the odds are stacked against them. I foresee this going to a tie breaker. Give the people what they want! One week playoff head to head!
Final thought - should a team get into the FF playoffs with a negative point differential?

